Sunday, December 09, 2012

Interpreting My Poem - V

And now one of my personal favourites. I had started writing this one as a self-imposed challenge to write something in the same tarah (combination of meter, rhyme and refrain) as a she’r written by a friend, that had completely blown me off. You can read more about that inspiration in this previous post.

As earlier, the English verses and interpretations are penned by Archana Gupta.


गरचिह हम वादाशिकन के नाम से जाने गये

बाइस-ए-ग़फ़्लतशियारी उनको समझाने गये
Although I was declared disloyal and promise-breaker in essence
All I tried to do was explain the reasons for my habitual negligence

गरचिह = Although, though, If; वादाशिकन = promise-breaker; बाइस = reason;
ग़फ़्लतशियारी = carelessness, negligence

I tried to explain things to her/them but on the basis of my (past record of) habitual negligence, I was declared disloyal/unfaithful.


ऐश-ओ-इशरत की तलब उस पर फ़ना होने की चाह

महफ़िल-ए-रक्स-ए-शरर की ओर परवाने गये
Craving for pleasure and glitter, the desire to obliterate self in her affection
Drove the moth towards the flame dancing in the congregation

ऐश = pleasure; इशरत = delight; तलब = desire; फ़ना = destruction, death; रक्स = dance; शरर = flame

The moth approached the dancing flame attracted by the glitter in pursuit of  simple pleasure & happiness unabashed by /unmindful of its inevitable destruction.  Possibly an indirect reference to people getting attracted to a glittery life instead of taking the high road, despite knowing the trade-off.


ज़ुल्म ख़ुद पर करने का हम को अजब ये शौक़ है

बज़्म-ए-ख़ूबाँ में हम अपने दिल को बहलाने गये
Torturing self must be a strange hobby of mine
Merely to be entertained, to her gathering I made a beeline

बज़्म = gathering; ख़ूबाँ = beautiful ones
 
I must have masochistic tendencies, I went to her/their gathering just for entertainment (knowing I'll likely be hurt by what I will see and the treatment that will be meted out to me).


ये हमारी ख़ू थी जो भेजा किये उनको ख़तूत

वो मगर क्यूँ ग़ैर से तहरीर पढ़वाने गये
Out of sheer force of habit, I wrote letters to her
But did she really have to get them read by a complete stranger

ख़ू = habit; ख़तूत = letters; तहरीर = writing
 
I wrote to her out of habit (knowing fully well that she will not comprehend), but why did she ask a stranger to interpret?
(Basic complain is against the lover letting a third party get an insider view of the relationship)


दोपहर की रौशनी में लगते हैं शफ़्फ़ाफ़ सब

रात जो आयी बदन के दाग़ पहचाने गये
In the light of the day, all the people seem transparent, sheer
It’s the night that makes all the blights clear

शफ़्फ़ाफ़ = transparent, clear

Looking at the the face people reveal (day or what is evident), everyone appears transparent (clear of heart and intent).  On getting to know people and understanding the nature they mask (night or what is hidden), we see the flaws.


है नहीं उम्मीद कोई उनसे शफ़क़त की हमें

चाक-ए-दिल ख़ून-ए-जिगर दुनिया को दिखलाने गये
From her I expect no understanding, no consideration
She who shared with strangers our affliction and tribulation

शफ़क़त = kindness, favour
 
Two very conflicting meanings emerge based on "who" the subject is in the second line.  I completely missed the second one till Aditya pointed it out...

  • I have no hope of understanding (of my need of privacy) from her, who went on to share our sorrows with strangers.
    and then there is…
  • Having lost all hope in her/dear ones, I shared my sorrows/wounds with complete strangers and started approaching all and sundry for a possible cure. 

I distinctly favor the first one as I do think that was the original intent and is more in line with the sentiments expressed in some of the other ash'aar of this ghazal as well as this poet's work elsewhere.


क़ैस-ओ-लैला शीरीं और फ़रहाद फिर हम और तुम

दास्तान-ए-इश्क़ में बस जुड़ते अफ़साने गये
Qais and Laila, Shirin and Farhad, and alas, now you and I too
Just some tales of romance for the world to gossip about and make much ado

क़ैस = Real name of legendary lover Majnoon;
 
We have also become yet another tale (talk of the town) for the world to talk about and discuss and interpret  -  another lament on the fact that details of our private relationship are open to world to interpret and comment on.